Bodies

I tweeted a few days ago and it got a bit of love. The said tweet went as follows, “How about we don’t comment on each other’s bodies and/or what other people eat?” Please excuse the cocky tone but I was angry, okay? It came from being completely baffled as to why people- including close family members- feel the need to provide a running commentary on my diet and presumably the effect it is having on my body.

In this day and age, when we are all aware how dramatically a single comment can have on a person’s view of themselves, it makes me furious when people still make judgemental assumptions about each other’s diet and lifestyle. I recently read British Bake Off finalist Ruby Tandoh’s article in vice, entitles, "The unhealthy truth behind wellness and clean eating" which for me, hit the nail on the head. In the article she condemned the ‘wellness’ industry for essentially being an elitist industry which perpetuated fears of fat, and called for an end to value judgements in food. 

Any discussion in which one food or food group is worshipped and labelled ‘good’ while another is demonised and labelled ‘bad’ is inherently problematic and simply unhealthy. As a young woman I’ve grown up with these unhealthy messages, which encourage feelings of guilt, self-hatred and punishment. 

When I was 13 years old one of my music teachers literally called me ‘fat’. So when you ask me, “should you really be eating that?” as I tuck into a bar of dark chocolate, congratulations- I’ve limited my diet for days in order to convince myself I ‘deserve’ this treat. Or when you observe, “there are loads of carbs in there Annabelle” as I cook a vegetarian chilli with rice, think about how carbohydrates are an important food group in a balanced diet, and how miserable I have sometimes made myself by cutting them out completely due to feeling ashamed at my body’s need for them.

I would never dream of passing such judgement about another person’s diet, partly because I literally don’t know a single young woman who hasn’t struggled with body image and food. Also because food is fuel, I grant you. But it is also a source of so much pleasure, and when we place value judgements on it that pleasure turns into misery and shame at every single meal. That means every birthday meal, Sunday lunch, Christmas day, snack at work, every brunch with friends can induce dread. 

So next time you are about to comment on someone else’s meal, remember that you have no idea what kind of struggles are going on inside their head at that moment, but that I can almost guarantee they will be about food.